i never asked to be saved [r], mortal instruments - Seren

[Yunalesca]

She recovered herself from her momentary lapse in judgment and subsequent reminder that she could not have him. Dream as she might it would not come to pass, it couldn’t. Regardless of her thoughts she fought to keep them from her expression when he spoke again and made her smile at him in humor. “I’m sure you would, though I can’t say I’ve seen a tan Shadowhunter before. You’d be the first.” She said with a smirk before realizing she had once more complimented his appearance, telling him again that she did notice him. Before she had fought to keep him out of her sight, but now she almost embraced it. Her eyes averted slightly once she noticed what she had said as she remembered how she had told herself to be careful with him. Things would change tomorrow and she couldn’t have him clinging to this night or what she said to him during it. But she also had to remember that applied to herself as well. “I’d probably burn if I was out too much. My skin isn’t used to direct rays.” She explained as though it would distract her from her train of thought when really it was making it worse. She was seeing them again, this vision of them enjoying their time together on some beach somewhere.



She quickly brushed it away once more in favor of think of something else to ask of him. The ease of their conversation at the restaurant was almost envious to her now as she found herself struggling again. She didn’t know what was appropriate to ask while she was fearful this exchange of information could lead to something more. Their questions always seemed innocent enough, but somehow the answers came out more intimate than intended. She took a calming breath to soothe away the discomfort while reminding herself for what seemed like the hundredth time that this had been her idea and they couldn’t just sit there in silence. “Do you have any favorite sports? Is there some big Nephilim sport only done inside the Glass City that I don’t know about, or do all Shadowhunters just spend their past time playing with their weaponry?” She asked of him suddenly after realizing she really didn’t know much about traditional Shadowhunters and what their past times were outside of the few she had been living with since coming to Brooklyn.



She couldn’t say she was raised like everyone else. She hadn’t even been born in the walls of Alicante nor had there been other Shadowhunter children to play with in the town her parents had chosen to settle outside of. What knowledge she had about the life chosen for her was from reading and being around a handful of people like her who really were nothing like her at all. She was the odd one out even if she was well trained and could handle herself. She battled with the others to keep fit, but she didn’t spend nearly the same amount of time with her weapons and in the training hall as the others did. She preferred to escape the reality of her situation rather than embrace it. Even if she had accepted she was a Shadowhunter and always would be, she still held one foot outside the world in hopes that she might escape some day. You’d lose him if you did. He’d never give this life up a voice whispered and she almost physically drew away. How could she lose something she never had in the first place?

[Serendipity]

He couldn’t help the next thought that crossed his mind after Audrina remarked that she would probably burn with too much sun. She wouldn’t burn if there was someone there to keep rubbing lotion into her skin, and what if that someone was him. Their questions always started out innocent enough, and for Audrina it might have remained that way, yet at every turn he was turning them into something intimate.His thoughts were going to get him in trouble, he knew and so he quickly pushed it aside before the image it brought had time to burn into his mind properly. Eli shuffled another handful of popcorn into his hand and popped a few pieces into his mouth, settling himself back into the corner of his seat a little more comfortably.

His eyes had moved to the screen to see if the movie they were there to see had started yet, it hadn’t and when she asked her next question he returned his gaze to her. His mouth had gone a little dry because of the popcorn he was eating and whilst he thought about answering her he reached for his drink, washing down some of the saltiness from the popcorn. There wasn’t a sport that he knew of that was strictly a shadowhunters preference, at least one that didn’t involve killing things. “Not particularly, it was always a bit of everything, mostly mundane sports. Soccer, tennis that sort of thing. So you're not missing out on anything there really,” He shrugged.

“I did see a game of baseball being played on a tv in a bar, it’s a bit like swinging a sword aimed at an oncoming demon. I could easily do that,” He explained, his description of the game was in a way right, but completely off at the same time. He’d only seen a game a couple of times when he’d been with Luke, it was there thing, sitting in the Werewolf bar drinking beer and watching mundane sport on the tv they had set up there. With a few drinks in his system it could be quite entertaining. “What about you, have you tried out any mundane sports other than dancing?” He asked.

At that moment the advertisements stopped playing and from the corner of his eye he could see the movie had started. “Sshh now, apparently they don’t like it when people talk during these things.” He smirked and straightened in his seat, he laid his arm on the armrest between them. It brought his arm in close proximity to the top half of her arm and that familiar urge to take her hand came up again and he wasn't sure if he’d be able to concentrate on the movie one little bit.

[Yunalesca]

She listened to his response and had to smile as he described baseball, or attempted to anyway. She may not know as much about the Mundane world as Clary, but she did know how some of their sports worked considering how passionate they seemed to be about it. She had followed a vampire more than once into a pub that only played the games on their televisions and had endured a few broadcasts of them while waiting for her mark to make a move. She almost laughed softly before she started to inform him she did know how baseball worked, but before she could do it the theater darkened more and Eli was shushing her. She tossed a jokingly scolding look toward him, though she wasn’t sure if he could see it, before shifting in her seat to a more comfortable position to watch the screen. “I know how a movie works, thank you.” She half hissed toward him, though the tone was hardly biting and more one of humor as the previews for upcoming films started.



While they played she couldn’t help but glance down and notice a few couple snuggling into each other, whispering in one another’s ear or giving a loving nuzzle to their significant others neck. She felt her mouth run dry at the scene, wondering if Eli expected this of her, if he expected anything at all. She had shared a bed with him the night before, but suddenly the prospect of his arm around her while watching a film was too much. She knew she could trust him and that he wouldn’t try anything at the risk of hurting her or her hurting him. When she got uncomfortable she receded back into her shell and the more violent side of her came out for the public to see. A few moments passed and Eli hadn’t moved from his shifted position which made her let go of the breath she had been holding. The thought of him wrapped around her in a dark theater made her afraid for reasons she couldnt discern and so when it didn't happen she felt relief. She took a breath and let it out slowly to calm herself before letting her hand travel to the popcorn and take a few popped kernels finally. The salt and butter mingled in her mouth, judgmental taste buds wanting her to spit it out, but she ate it anyway. She had said popcorn was part of the experience.

It was sometime near there end of the previews that her hand found his, almost as though it were some kind of compromise or thanks for not forcing himself on her. He had no idea what was going through her mind and so wouldn't know this was a form of gratitude, but she knew and she felt that was all the mattered. She let her fingers slide between his and curl slightly like an embrace around his own as the theater grew completely dark and the tell tale signs that the film was finally starting hit the air. They were hardly into the film by the time she realized this wouldn't be a harmless western like she had believed. She actually found herself laughing softly at the quirkiness of the Tonto character, but as the film progressed and people started dying she felt her stomach churning slightly. She saw death every day and knew this wasn't real, but it made her remember all too well the way that first Were's blood had stained her hands as she had driven her blade through him. It took a while for her to recover from the death of several characters near the beginning of the film. Well placed comedic relief between the Native and the horse slowly brought her back from morbid visions dancing before her eyes.

By the end she was a little emotional, but not enough to cry. It hadn't ended with the intent to make people cry, but maybe appreciate Mundane history a little more even if this story was fabricated. As the credits began rolling she turned her head and looked to Eli, their hands still entangled together when the lights began to come up. "I think maybe I should refrain from picking movies. Did you have anything else in mind after this?" She asked him quietly as she heard the others leaving the theater so they were the last remaining with their nearly empty bucket of popcorn and sodas.

[Serendipity]

Eli smirked at the look she gave him after he shushed her and small chuckle rumbled deep in his chest at brought his eyes back in front. There were still advertisements playing on the screen but of a different kind, these were showcasing the up and coming movies, enticing mundanes to come back when they were released. He wasn’t paying attention to them however as his gaze fell to a few couples in the rows below them. He felt a little uncomfortable watching them, wondering if Audrina expected him to do such things; he’d have no hesitation if she did but he had no clue what was running through her mind right now, not even when he snuck a sideways glance at her, her eyes were fixed on the screen ahead.

The temptation was there to reach over and take her hand, get back the small intimacy they had lost when they’d left the restaurant. She had distanced herself from him a little again since then thanks to their unwelcome guest and he had lost all confidence that taking her hand would be a good thing. So his arm stayed put on the armrest, his fingers curled inward to hide some of the tension he was suddenly feeling. The couples snuggling below didn’t help his cause and he wished they would stop.

Then he felt her hand cover his; his eyes snapped down to watch as she slipped her fingers through his and he was instantly relaxed. He didn’t read too much into the gesture, didn’t suddenly think it was because she craved the connection between them as much as he did, he just went with it grateful that it was even happening. He barely recognised what was happening on the screen as the film finally started, it appeared as though he was watching it but really he’s only focus was the feeling of her hand curled around his once more. After a short while into the film he realised he could do both and paid more attention to what was happening on screen.

At one point, when it became apparent that the movie wasn’t as harmless as it was first thought to be and people in it started dying off, he thought Audrina might want to leave. She hadn’t wanted a violent movie and though he had seen worse then what was displayed on screen -and in real life- he was preparing himself for her to say the word and they would go. Eli squeezed her hand reassuringly through a few scenes whenever he felt her tense.

He couldn’t help but laugh at some of the interactions between the main character and his horse and was pleased to hear Audrina laughing softly beside him. By the time the movie finished his hand had gone a little numb, it had remained in hers the whole time but still he didn't let it go, even as the other couples began rising from their seats to leave. When he turned to look at her he thought he saw her eyes shining a little, he must have missed something in the ending as he didn't feel quite as emotional.

“Next time I’ll pick the movie and we can compare our movie picking skills.” He laughed at her remark. “It wasn’t that bad...could have been more realistic.” He critiqued, some of the scenes were way out there for mundanes to be able to pull off.

He didn't know what the usual protocol was now that the movie had finished, did he take her back to the Institute or did they find something else to do. He wasn’t sure how late it was, not that it mattered, he was sure there was still a diner open somewhere or they could just walk around for a bit. “We could get coffee somewhere?” He suggested, “Or get them take away and go for a walk.”

[Yunalesca]

She had to smile softly at his remark and attempt to bring about how unrealistic the film really was. Obviously computers had been involved with many of the scenes that had taken place over the course of the movie, but in some way Mundanes still amazed her with how humanistic touches remained even with CGI and green screens. They may not be as powerful as Shadowhunters or demons, but they did things that were remarkable. A small twinge of why her race had been made to protect the weaker humans from the darlings of the world seeped through her after that. They were worth preserving. She said none of this to Eli, however, as he seemed to be thinking of how to answer her question. Now that it was just the two of them without interruptions she felt up to whatever he suggested. In the past being left alone with him may have caused panic, but she was relaxed with the idea now. He hadn't forced a thing on her since they had left the Institute and she found she was trusting him more because of it.

When he offered up a few suggestions she considered them while finally detaching her hand from his, albeit a bit reluctantly, and gathered their empty containers. She piled the drinks and candy boxes into the empty popcorn bucket for disposal without having voiced her decision yet. "How about we start with coffee and go from there? I know of a late night Starbucks around the corner." She commented as she started to get up with the trash in hand. "I know this time it won't be such a bad decision. So long as you don't mind staying up a while, their coffee is a little strong." She informed while sliding past him to take the lead. As she did so her breath caught harshly in her throat. The feel of his heat as she brushed past made her almost pause while she tried to play off it didn't affect her. It made her want to turn and embrace him for some reason. It made her miss how his scent enveloped her when they were close. It made her recognize once again that this wasn't just a friendship. There was a strong attraction there for him and she wasn't so naive as to miss the obvious signs.

Don't make this difficult she thought in her head as she made herself keep going like nothing had happened. She couldnt let him think they had possibilities or that she liked him as much as he seemed to like her. It would be another event of her stringing him along. There would have to be a clean break eventually and complicating matters, even if thats what she wanted, wouldn't allow that. She had to remember to keep her indulgences to a minimum. Like sleeping in her own bed alone tonight would be a start, even if she wanted to ask to stay with him again. She tossed their trash and tried to let her overactive mind go with it. When she over thought things she turned impulsive and awkward silences tended to occur more. She wanted to forget all her inhibitions and concerns for one night, but not so much that she fell into a dream world that she knew could never last. Those things didn't work out as planned for her and it was safer to steer clear of them. People got hurt when they got too close to her. History showed as much.

When they stepped out of the theater she noticed it had gotten dark in the time they had been in the movie, though she couldnt say exactly what time it was. With the coming of fall the days were getting shorter and threw off her natural clock. All this told her body was it was time to get ready to hunt though she had no intentions of doing that tonight, or maybe even tomorrow. She used her head once in a while and knew she wasn't ready to be slaying anything just yet. Her reaction to the vampire at dinner had been a good indication of that. She brushed the memory aside and turned slightly toward Eli, looping her arm around his as though it were natural so she could guide him toward the coffee shop. "You going to just get plain old boring black or broaden your horizons a little tonight? They can make almost any flavor you can imagine." She prodded, leaning her weight into him a little as a nudge while they walked. In her mind she was thinking she may be able to get used to this even as the voice reminded her that she wasn't allowed to. "And given the time of night I'd say we won't have to grab carry out for the others. They're either getting ready to hunt or arguing amongst themselves about what to order for food." She mused to him aloud with a slight smile. There was more than enough stock in the fridge to make food, but anything beyond macaroni and cheese or sandwiches they were done for. Unfortunately for them, since she had moved in there wasn't an easy box of Mac and cheese to make. She did things from scratch and didn't believe in the powdery false cheese. Though she wondered if Clary was capable of cooking.

"And here we are." She said after turning them a corner. "One almost every few blocks in Brooklyn. Even more in Manhattan. In case you get addicted." She said with a smirk to him before letting go of his arm and pushing through the storefront door. Upon stepping up to the counter she scanned the menu slightly before looking to the Mundane male waiting for her order. "Grande mint with a touch of mocha. No whipped cream topping, please." She asked of him before looking to Eli still seemingly perusing the menu options. A slight smile came to her face as she did so. She had a feeling he would go with black just to make it easier.

[Serendipity]

“How strong?” He asked curiously but shook his head, he guessed he would find out for himself and he didn’t think he’d be able to sleep straight away anyway if they went back to the Institute now. The thought of sleep made him a little wary because he knew that tonight he’d be sleeping on his own; last night was a one off, they’d both needed the company but they couldn’t rely on sleeping in the same bed every night --as much as he’d like it to be the case. He remained in his seat even as Audrina stood up, collecting the empty popcorn box she’d put all their rubbish in and let her slip past, pulling his knees in so she had room. But she didn’t move far away before he was standing, bringing them into close proximity again and as he felt the heat of her body so close to his he drew in a small breath.

She felt it too, he didn’t know how he could tell he just did and they were still for a few seconds while coming to terms with the reaction it instilled in both of them. Eli cleared his throat and made sure there was enough distance between them once she walked off between the row of seats before following her. He still wore his jacket, it had been cool inside the theatre, but now he felt incredible hot around the collar. They would be outside again soon where it was much cooler and he made himself keep it on.

Once she had thrown their rubbish in the bin and they were outside of on the street he could breathe a little easier, not realising he’d been holding his breath until he let it out now. How the hell was he supposed to go on every day sharing moments like that with her and not being able to act on them, it was going to drive him crazy he was quickly discerning. Before she turned around and saw him he ran his fingers through his hair to calm the thoughts racing through his mind; what was he doing, could he love this woman knowing it may never be returned, how much longer could he go on with only brief touches and hand holding when she allowed it?

Like now as she looped her arm through his whilst asking if he would stick with his choice of boring black coffee or go out on a limb and try something different. By the angel, he wanted to feel his arm around her waist not just looped through her arm! He offered her a small smile that didn’t quite reach his lips, trying to win out the battle going on inside of him not to take this too far. “What’s wrong with straight black coffee? It does the job.” He insisted and chuckled at her little nudge into his arm.

At the mention of the others he realised he hadn’t thought about what they would be doing, if they would trying to scrounge something up to eat or bypassing it altogether and get straight to hunting. “I imagine they won’t be letting Isabelle cook.” He mused with her and grinned a little, he did feel a little sorry for the brunette, she tried at least even though her efforts were always in vain. He hadn’t ventured into these Starbucks coffee shops Audrina had spoken of and was now leading him to, they had always looked so complicated to him, too many choice and too many mundanes. When they entered the Starbucks she had steered him too, surprisingly not far away and explained there were a lot of them around he confirmed why he stayed away from them as he looked up at the board trying to decide what he’d have.

Audrina ordered what she would have after only a brief glance at the menu which suggested she frequented the place often. He took his time looking over the menu but in the end he decided to stick with what he knew and what his taste buds were familiar with. “Black, strong, no sugar.” He instructed the male behind the counter deciding against the sweet additive, he’d had enough sugar with all the candy they had shared during the movie. He glanced down at Audrina who was looking at him with a smug expression, like she had guessed he would choose that and nudged her playfully with his arm. “Guess I’ll broaden my horizons another time.” He told her.

With their coffees in hand he led her over to his choice of table, by the window, he liked sitting by windows he’d chosen a similar seating position when he’d taken her to the diner. Eli removed his jacket and hung it over the back of his chair before he sat down, the coffee shop was warm inside and admittedly he was still trying too cool off after walking so close beside the blonde on the way here. "So this training session tomorrow...will we using batten rods again?" He asked before he could stop the comment, why did he want to bring up the memory of their last session again after the last reaction he'd had to them. Perhaps he was just a gluten for punishment.

[Yunalesca]

She had already deduced he was going for solid black before he even opened his mouth to make the order. She saw the Mundane start to question what kind of grounds he wanted, but she shook her head slightly to him, telling him not to ask and just choose their darkest brew. Eli hadn’t chosen a flavoring and so she figured he wouldn’t want to decide what kind of black coffee he’d want either. While Eli was distracted with the board and multitude of syrups behind the bar she pulled free the cash for their drinks as well as a tip to the baristas. Letting him pay for dinner and concessions had been enough for her. She was about keeping it even and had never been a girl who enjoyed being catered to. Although she’d never had anyone to cater to her so she couldn’t say she wouldn’t get used to it eventually. The Mundane thanked her and turned away to make their drinks, Eli’s done a lot faster than her own.



She took her coffee from him and moved with Eli to the window seat he chose. She settled into the seat with her coffee simmering between both hands, eyes turned to look out the window with the street illuminated by lamplight. She watched people pass on their way to who knew where until Eli spoke up. She turned her head back to him, brows rose as she realized she had zoned out momentarily as her coffee warmed her hands and simultaneously began to cool off enough for her to drink. After what he said sunk in she felt herself stop breathing momentarily, remembering how their last session had ended. She could almost feel his lips brushing gently against hers until she’d given way to him. She blinked away the memory and breathed again, bringing her coffee to sip as a distraction before allowing herself to answer. She let the mint and caffeine sink in before allowing herself to attempt to say anything.



“I prefer it, but hand to hand wouldn’t hurt. I haven’t really had practice with that for a while and could use it.” She finally responded with, though the idea of hand to hand combat with Eli was bringing a flurry of other things along with it. None of them really had much to do with actually fighting or training. Control your thoughts she heard herself say as she took another sip of her coffee and appreciated the flavors a little more this time as she focused in on them to disperse her thoughts of their ending their training with another kiss. She had done that too many times with him. If it continued there would have be a defining of what they were and even though she liked the thought of being with him (oddly) the thought of being defined as with him made her afraid. She’d never had commitment with anyone and so the thought didn’t bring her comfort. She couldn’t draw an experience on it and without knowing what it would bring she was afraid of it.



“Was there anything you need to work on? I know you work with Jace, but I might offer a different perspective.” She asked of him while setting her coffee back down. “Enjoying your muggy straight black coffee with no sugar?” She prodded with a smirk, her foot tapping him under the table at the same time. Her earlier thoughts of reeling it in were dispersing again as the caffeine fired neurons in her brain, making her feel happier than before.

[Serendipity]

Eli leaned forwards, his arms resting over the table and his hands were wrapped around his hot cup of coffee. His eyes were on the blonde in front of him and there was a slight smile in them as he watched her staring out the window, zoning out. It gave him the opportunity to study her closely, something he quite enjoyed doing and had done during dinner. Audrina was still a mystery to him, even when he thought he was starting to get to know her, there were things that he didn’t know but wanted to. The biggest mystery of all had nothing to do with her past or even her present, it mystified him as to how someone so withdrawn behind her walls could intrigue him so much and keep his attention for more than ten seconds.

He didn’t usually go for girls that openly disliked him and had no qualms telling him as such every time they had been in the same room. It had become a game for him at first, getting under her skin, watching the fire flash in her grey orbs as she shouted insults at him. The way she fired him up as well, that she could easily get under his skin in return had been most unexpected and that was when the curiosity had set in. Eli had wanted to know what made her tick so to speak, what drove her to her hatred of vampires or her separation people. Then completely out of no where he’d felt a need to protect her, comfort her, be the one she went to when her demons became too much. Even then he’d thought it wouldn’t last, he’d get bored of her, move on -- had tried to do just that, but his thoughts always went back to her, he always went back to her.

He had been trying to prove by the kiss they’d shared in the training room that day that she was attracted to him, simply for the satisfaction of knowing it but also to prove to himself that one kiss would be enough to satisfy his curiosity and he’d move on to focussing on finding his brother. That plan had completely backfired on him, almost knocking the cockiness right out of him when he’d realised one kiss from her wasn’t going to be enough and all it had done was ignited a need to truly get to know her.

Eli blinked out of his reverie that he had unwittingly fallen into as the blonde he’d been thinking about started answering his question about their training session. Hand to hand combat. It would mean touching one another, if only to block blows but it would still be skin to skin. He almost groaned at the thought because it might just prove torturous, touching her but not really being able to touch her. He regretted asking her that question now since it was all he was going to able to think about whilst she wasn’t in his presence until morning. “I could work on that, Jace and I usually use swords or daggers. He likes pointy things.” Eli casually but it was bit of an effort to think of words.

He smirked as she asked about his coffee and in answer he lifted it to his mouth to take a tentative sip, it was still a little hot, then tried to keep the grimace off of his expression as he tasted the bitterness behind the drink. It wasn't like any coffee he’d tasted, maybe he should have added sugar. Ignoring his dislike for the substance he tapped her foot back under the table. “Yep.” He responded. He’d never thought he’d play ‘footsies’ under a table with anyone, but there he was doing just that, in a small sense anyway.

“How’s yours? Smells minty…” He returned, how coffee could smell or even taste minty he had no idea but apparently these Starbucks places had figured it out.

[Yunalesca]

She watched as he took a sip of his coffee as though to prove he enjoyed it, but she saw the small muscles at the corner of his mouth and under his eye twitch that would tell her otherwise. He’d asked for the strongest and that was what he had been given. She felt that maybe she should have ordered for him instead, but she knew they were both headstrong and independent. She would hate it if he had ordered her dinner for her and figured he would have felt the same about her choosing his coffee for him. She had to bite on her lip and turn her head to look out the window in an attempt to hide the laugh that was coming on at the expression he was giving while trying to make it appear the coffee wasn’t bad. Her eyes closed while she took a breath to get rid of the laugh that was trying to escape her, it falling to the wind without a sound before she turned her eyes back to Eli when he spoke again.



“Almost perfect. There’s a difference between mint syrup and the real thing, but it’s still good.” She acknowledged of the drink, taking another sip as she turned her attention back to him once more. Her eyes dropped to his cup, barely a third of the coffee missing from it after his taste. Without waiting for approval she picked up her own cup and poured some of her own coffee into his. She knew different beans had been used in producing each of their drinks, but the syrup would overpower that little inconsistency. She pulled her cup away and raised her brow at him as though she were waiting for his rebuke. “Try it. It’ll taste better on my honor or you can…have my room for a week or something.” She said, pulling the first thing off the top of her head without realizing that he might just enjoy that. She was thinking of how homey and personality infused her room had become over the time she had been there in comparison with his which still lacked a personal touch. She had never had a goal in infusing her personality into the room, she hadn’t wanted to stay this long, but it had happened with the start of her choosing different bed sheets. She didn’t like the standard white that came with most of the rooms, it reminded her too much of Jace.



It was only after she said it that she realized the implications and had to look out the window again as her cheeks burned pink, and that wasn't from the coffee. "I'll be right back." She said before excusing herself from the table and making for the bathroom at the back of the coffee shop. Partly because she needed to get away to breathe for a moment and partly because she had drank more than a regular bladder could hold. As she closed the door she exhaled loudly, head thumping against the door as she looked to the ceiling. "What are you thinking?" She said to herself before pushing off the door. After thoroughly scrubbing her hands she patted her face with a damp hand towel from the dispenser to chase away the heat she still felt after what she had said to him. The copious amounts of thoughts concerning Eli were inappropriate for her considering she wouldn't act on them. She could almost see him waiting for her to let him in, let him kiss her, but she continued to keep him at bay but just barely. She felt for him, but she couldn't turn away from her promise to herself concerning her mother.



She dried her face quickly and left the bathroom, feeling a little better and hoping he hadn't spent the time thinking about what she'd said. She got back to the table and slid into her seat, instantly taking a drink of her coffee before looking to him, almost afraid of what she'd see in his eyes. "There's a few clubs in the area I could take you to after this if you're too awake still. Mostly Downworlder so maybe you won't get in any fights." She said with a light smile, though she hardly felt she would be able to handle a club tonight. The Were hostess and the uninvited vampire had been enough for her tonight, but she'd feel guilty making him return back to Institute when he was wired and unable to sleep.

[Serendipity]

If he was a true coffee lover, he probably would have enjoyed the taste of the coffee he’d ordered or at least learn to enjoy it. He liked coffee, the buzz it gave, but he was happy to stick the plain and ordinary because thats what his taste buds had become accustomed too over the years. So when Audrina reached for his cup after he struggled with another few mouthfuls and topped it up with hers he didn’t try and stop her. Obviously she wasn’t buying that he liked his as it was and had sought to rectify that for him.

He offered her a smile of thanks but now eyed the remaining contents with her added flavoring a little suspiciously. The aroma of it was now a mixture of bitterness and a hint of mint. His brow quirked as she assured him it would make his taste better, and if it didn’t he could have or room for a week, or borrow something of hers. “Really? This could be interesting then. Where would you sleep?” He asked innocently playing along with her suggestion, though he doubted he would let her give up her room for the sake of coffee. Eli tentatively picked up the cup and tasted the new brew in the same manner. Admittedly it wasn’t as bitter as before, the added sweetness from the mint syrup taking some of it away, yet he still wasn’t sure about it. “You’d better start making room for me,” He said with all seriousness.

He let her stew over the idea of now having to give her room up for him for a moment before he drank some more from his cup, a grin playing over his lips as he brought the cup to them. “Just joking. It’s not that bad.” He said, letting her off the hook but the implications of her offer had already began to set in for both of them he guessed as she quickly announced she would be right back. He sighed heavily as she left and watched her go for a bit before turning his gaze out the window whilst he waited for her to return.

Eli hadn’t noticed the woman across the room looking at him over the top of the book she was reading until he saw her reflection in the window. He smirked because it was the first reaction that came to mind before he turned his head in her direction letting her know he had caught her out looking at him. She was a little taller than Audrina and a brunette but apart from acknowledging that she was alright to look at it was as far as it went for him and he turned his gaze away. His expression completely changed when he saw Audrina walking back to their table, a soft smile on his lips and an eagerness in his eyes for her return which he quickly dispelled before she noticed.

“You want to take me to a club?” He asked evenly making sure he had heard her right as she sat back down in her seat. He was surprised by the suggestion considering the last time they’d been in a club together things had gotten a little messy. Though it could be different this time, he wouldn’t drink as much and they’d stay together...dance together. He shook his head, not because he didn’t like her idea or want to go to a club with her again, he just didn’t think the timing was right. His emotions were too up and down, being in a club which would involve dancing was too tempting of an idea and a dangerous one.

“I’d probably get into more fights if its full of Downworlders,” He clarified before giving her his answer. “I think we should head back after this, what would Hodge say if he found out I got into a brawl with a bunch of Downworlders again.” He said, politely declining her suggestion of going out to a club and sensing that he had made the right decision as she almost looked relieved by his answer.

[Yunalesca]

She wasn’t sure if she was successful in hiding her relief from her face or not when he said they could pass on the club idea for the night. She was a little surprised he had decided against it, he seemed like a party animal when they’d first met, but she wasn’t going to try and convince him to change his mind either. “I suppose you’re right. We know how well I mingle with them as well.” She said with an unamused smirk, not remembering how she had embraced his brother before nearly killing herself trying to protect him from Jarek. But he was different. He was Eli’s family. He may be Downworlder, but he hadn’t been the one who attacked her and broke her bones to prove a point. He had saved her life and for that she didn’t think of him as one of them. She’d never had an issue with Were’s until Maddox had come alone. She was neutral about Luke, not caring that he was one though she probably would be saddened if he did disappear. She brushed that from her mind after taking another sip of her coffee, eyes moving toward the center of the shop and seeing a woman watching her rather closely though she was trying to appear otherwise. A slight frown pulled at her face before she wiped it and looked back to Eli.



“Or I could introduce you to her. I see your charm with Mundane women hasn’t lessened.” She said with the most neutral tone she could muster. She couldn’t say she was jealous seeing how he hadn’t made a move on the woman, and that she wasn’t actually ‘with’ him, but she didn’t particularly like the look the woman was giving with her eyes. She may be inadvertent about it, but Audrina had spent a good portion of her life reading signs and this woman was signing to her that she wanted her to shove off and make way for her Mundane self. She almost rolled her eyes at the thought before sliding off her chair and stepping a few feet away to grab lids for their coffees in case they couldn’t be finished before either of them decided they wanted to go. She handed Eli his before securing her own lid on her cup. “There would be one difference, though, if you were to get in a brawl. People don’t expect much from me because I’m considered tiny. It’s usually the last mistake they make.” She offered as she took another sip from the cup. She was skinny, her bones were small, but she wasn’t short like Clary. She wasn’t quite as tall as Isabelle either, but she fell in that middle ground that was good for a number of dance types. She could have been on top of the world if she had been allowed to stick with it.



“So we’ve concluded that you hate my coffee and I’m not very good at picking films. All these questions we’ve asked of each other and I still don’t know you very well.” She mused almost humorously to him, though a voice in her mind reminded her that she had barely given him anything of herself either. He remembered she liked peppermint in her tea, but that was probably the most significant thing. It wasn’t a defining factor and it showed her that maybe she hadn’t dropped her walls as much as she had previously thought. Do you owe him anything? that more guarded voice asked and she almost instantly though ‘yes’. As independent as she boasted to be, he had been the one to keep her nightmares at bay and distract her from what had almost happened to her. He had concerned himself with her when he should have been concerned with him brother. She owed him more than she liked to admit.



“But if you want to go back I won’t twist your arm. The Institute is quieter at this time. We could go somewhere and talk or…polish our weapons or something if you’re not tired from the coffee.” She offered to him, that memory of owing him prodding her into not letting the night end without a little more talking and bonding. She knew she shouldn’t be doing any of it and should go to bed when they got back, but she couldn’t after thinking of how he had been her stability for a few days. She knew full well that talking could make things slip she didn’t want or somehow it could turn intimate for them again. She was going into it with a clear head with no intentions of anything, but it didn’t always work out that way.

[Serendipity]

Eli frowned at Audrina’s proposal of introducing him to the Mundane woman a few tables away, he’d forgotten about her the moment Audrina had walked back to their table. “They must have bad taste,” He answered, for the first time actually putting himself down about his looks because he really didn’t care about another woman’s attention unless it was from the one sitting across from him. He didn’t even spare the woman a glance and was more concerned with the notion that Audrina might have thought he had provoked the woman’s attention somehow.

He disregarded any further comment about the Mundane woman as Audrina continued on the subject of brawling with Downworlders and how her small frame could be used to her advantage. It was true, even he hadn’t expected her to take down a larger opponent. He had quickly learned that that wasn’t the case at all, she could hold her own and in their last training session he had ended up flat on his back at one point. “They’d get quite the shock.” He agreed and took the lid she handed across to him securing it on his cup.

“I didn’t say I hated it,” He quickly corrected with an amused smile. “It’s just different.” He said before focussing on the last part of her comment about not knowing much about him. He could say the same about her, but was quite happy to keep conversation on him if thats what she wanted. “What do you want to know?” He asked, he would be open with her but he’d already decided that earlier that day.

He was rising from his seat as she agreed to go back to the Institute if he wanted, it didn’t mean that their time together would end which was pleased about, he wasn’t tired and wanted to spend as much time with her as possible before the next day came and he suspected she might not be so open. He shrugged on his jacket after retrieving it from the back of his chair and picked up his coffee cup. “Weapons can wait, we can talk more in the greenhouse if you want.” He said as he waited for her to get up, the moment she did he reached for her free hand and walked her out of the Starbucks.

“Ask me anything.” He said once again when they were back on the streets of Brooklyn, reminding her that she had said she didn’t know him very well and possibly wanted to.

[Yunalesca]

Noting that he was getting up she did the same, buttoning her coat 3\4 of the way to fight the chill before taking her half empty drink in hand. She had almost exclusively drank tea since Eli's arrival and so the coffee was giving her a bit of a rush now. By the time her feet hit the floor his hand was finding hers and she was growing warm again. They had been holding hands during most of their evening and so she should have been numbed to any reaction, but she wasn't. Every time they touched she felt herself stop breathing and moving for a second. Her eyes found him in that brief pause before she sunk her fingers between his in a return gesture. He had been a little forward in doing it, but she had relaxed enough in his presence that she wasn't offended by it. Maybe she was finally recovering from Maddox' attack, or she was just that comfortable with Eli now. She gave him a gentle smile before they were walking out of the Starbucks and back to the streets of Brooklyn.

She was content with sipping her coffee and walking beside Eli in silence, but he broke the quiet between them with a second offer for her to ask about him, remembering how she had said she barely knew him. She had to laugh a little, her head tilting down so her hair fell in her eyes before she looked at him. "I'm really bad with these things, you should know that by now. Interaction with other people is not my strong point." She explained almost needlessly. She had barely talked to anyone since coming to Brooklyn and had little practice with it from before. Communication with others had pretty much ceased when her sister died and she was left alone in the world. One might say she had to social skills of a fifteen year old except she had always been a little advanced for her age. She was educated, but there had never been much of a reason for her to get to know anyone she came across. She could interrogate, but simple conversation was a struggle. Things seemed to come easy with Eli, but she still struggled with a lot of it.

"Alright. Tell me about growing up with your brother. Were you really close, like fight over the same girls and all that stuff?" She asked of him, trying not to make the question too personal but learn more about him in the process. She hasn't really been told outright, but she felt almost like it was taboo to ask about his parents. He said 'anything' but she couldnt bring herself to ask about that. She knew Travis was alive and well and so it would be easier for him to talk about him. She still had struggles with talking about her family and the last thing she wanted was to upset him in any way. His parents might give her more insight on him, but she felt she wasn't so worthy of that kind of information. Maybe he would tell her on his own someday, but until then she wasn't going to ask outright. She knew in asking about him it would only be fair it work both ways, but how much more could she give? They had concluded to talk when they got back seeing how they were drinking coffee and wouldn't be tired so that meant she would have to say something of herself.

"I'll try to be a little more open about myself...for you." She added quietly, pausing their walk as the crosswalk sign motioned them to stop and she looked up at him. Telling him that almost felt intimate for some reason. It was like a promise and no Shadowhunter went back on that. She may have promised more than what she could deliver, but looking at him with the city lights playing out behind him made it hard for her to imagine saying no. He had become increasingly patient with her since they first met and she once more felt that she owed him. He had changed from the guy that just wanted to bed her after drinking and dancing with her. He was gentle and understanding. He listened to more than just her voice, but her body signals as well. He had learned to become more attuned to her over the few weeks they had known each other and it should be frightening. But looking at him she didn't even feel that.

[Serendipity]

He might have been a little forwarded by taking her hand in his again, but he was prepared to let go if he felt her pull back only she didn't and after another few seconds he felt her fingers interlocking with his and smiled a little to himself. He wondered maybe if she was coming to realise that he wasn't the jerk she first thought he was, over the last few weeks together he had shown her a different side of himself and that he wasn't always egotistical and arrogant. He hoped at least if she hadn't before she was starting too now.

Eli lifted his cup to his mouth for another drink of the warm liquid as they came out onto the street where the air was a little icy after being in the heated coffee shop. He held Audrina's hand but he allowed her to lead the way, she knew where she was going better then he did. She stopped them at the side of the road before they crossed together, almost jogging a little to beat the traffic. He would have been content to walk with her sipping their coffees as they went in silence, maybe take in his surroundings a little more but he'd reminded her that she could ask him anything she wanted if she liked and he would answer.

His eyes shone with a little amusement as he looked down at her upon her explanation that she didn't particularly interact with other people that well and so she wasn't very good at asking someone personal things about themselves. He knew this already, but still he'd wanted her to know that if she wanted to ask him something she could. Eli wouldn't have taken offence to anything she asked him, not even if she asked him about his parents, he was that sure that he wanted her to know everything about him. Maybe if she did she would feel more comfortable with him and in return share more about herself. Of course she couldn't find out everything about him in just one session of questioning, it would take time and they would need more outings like theses help the process along. A good excuse to go out with her again.

She asked him about his brother, whether they were really close though before he could begin his answer she was adding quietly that she would try and be more open in return, for him. He squeezed her hand gently in his, appreciating her offer and nodded before he went on to tell her more about his relationship with his brother growing up. "As you know I'm the eldest and for a few years I had my parents to myself, until Travis came along. He was fine when he was a baby, always sleeping not getting in my way. I was never jealous of him though, and I guess it was because our parents made sure they shared each other evenly between us, we were both their favourites." Eli began, he hadn't taken the easy way out and simply answered her with a yes or no or a quick retell of he and Travis growing up.

"It was when he started to crawl -" There was a grin forming over his lips as he recalled that past memory. "- that I really started to form a bond with him, he was my little brother and I made sure he went everywhere with me. I dragged him all over our property and we had all sorts of adventures. We were in separable, we literally did everything together." Eli explained with a small laugh. He grew warm inside remembering the good times he and Travis had had before everything had happened with his parents and Travis had had to grow up quickly. "As we got older we started doing our separate things, Travis played with his friends more and I began my training with our father to become a Shadowhunter but we were still close."

"There was one girl that Travis had a huge thing for, she was almost two years older then him but he didn't care, he thought he was in love. I didn't feel the same way, I guess we have different tastes in girls..." He chuckled, the fondness of the memories he was sharing showed a little in his expression as he called them, however it faded to one of deep regret as he spoke next. "We drifted apart a little after our parents died. I think I made him grow up too quickly, he suddenly had this urge to prove himself, that was how he ended up in his messy situation with the Were's." He sighed and glanced down at his empty cup, he must have drank some of it whilst he'd been talking and hadn't realised it, and tossed it in the first bin he saw.

[Serendipity]

Eli nodded a little absently however he could still hear what she was saying as she explained how she thought dealing with the loss of one's parents was different for everybody. She was right, he guessed it was different for everybody and felt that pinch of regret in the back of his throat when she went on to talk about how she and her sister had only grown closer when her father had died. It could have been the same for Travis and he if he only hadn’t been caught up in all of his guilt. He blamed himself still for what happened to his father, and even more so for what happened to his mother...if he’d just been there he might have changed the outcome. It wasn’t the best of times to let his thoughts head down that path, and he hadn’t meant them too. He gave an almost nervous laugh and shook his head, running his free hand through his hair. “The world works in a peculiar way sometimes,” He agreed.

He was glad for the change of subject with her next question as they continued to walk down the street, his only guess was that they were headed for a subway station. Audrina had allowed a little insight to her own relationship between her and her sister, yet he’d noticed she still hadn’t been able to say her sisters name and it wasn’t the first time. He understood the difficulty of doing it, sometimes it could open the floodgates by saying a loved ones name after they were gone, he too found it near impossible to say his mothers name out-loud.

Eli inhaled a small breath to steady his voice afraid she might hear just how affected he had started to become by speaking of the loss of his parents, even if he hadn’t mentioned much about it in detail. He had said she could ask him anything, and her question had been innocent enough, it wasn’t her fault that it brought back certain memories he’d rather forget. He still stood by his statement too, she could ask him anything and he’d answer though it was perhaps preferable if they left the heavy stuff for when they were back at the Institute.

He saw a sign for the subway station and led her in that direction before he answered her question regarding the similarities between Institutes. “Yeah we did. It was for the best, Travis hadn’t finished his education and I wasn’t quite eighteen yet.” He told her with a small nod before he continued on about the Institute itself. “London Institute is slightly larger than the one here, but its only because it has an underground cellar used as a workshop, the dining room is a little grander though; there’s two massive chandeliers on either end. Other than that it’s fairly similar, but its a lot stuffier, always feels damp.” He explained.

“I’ve only been to one another Institute other than Brooklyn Institute and it was the same too, but I’ve heard that the Institute in Hawaii is completely different from them all, I guess because its right on the beach, on its own Island and everything.” He didn’t know how true that actually was since he hadn’t been there himself to see firsthand.

[Yunalesca]

She sipped silently at her coffee as he told her about his brother, a slight smile coming to her face as he spoke and she was reminded of her own relationship with her passed sibling. Hearing him speak of his brother in his youth brought back her own memories of holding her infant sister for the first time shortly after her birth. It was only now that Audrina realized the both of them had been born at home, that her parents had never gone back to the Glass City to have help in bringing their children into the world. It made her see things a little differently, it made her a little more proud of the woman her mother had been, but it also made her chest squeeze in the same instance. Her parents had been strong enough to raise the girls completely on their own, but painful ends still came to them. She swallowed another mouthful of coffee and tossed her own thoughts aside.



What had once been a light conversation turned more somber as he trailed off on a more heart wrenching note. She knew all too well a parents death affected relationships all around. She felt that maybe she had been more fortunate than Eli in that respect. Her father’s death had brought the girls closer instead of pushing them apart. The women had bonded into a tight knit group in realization that they needed each other more than ever. Her eyes dropped down to her cup as she took a last drink of the liquid before sneaking it into a bin as they passed one. “It’s possible that’s what happened. Everyone deals with it differently. People shut down, others seek out other people to keep them distracted from it. I don’t think it’s ever really the same between two people, even siblings.” She said to him, her voice a little distracted as she remembered how she had had to sleep with her sister for a good year after their father had died. Audrina had always been closer with him than Aurelie, but that didn’t stop the pain. She remembered hearing her younger sister waking from night terrors in the room next door and she would slip from her own bed to crawl in beside her and make the nightmares go away for a while.



It reminded her of what Eli had been doing for her since her own nightmares had become too much for her. It was reminiscent of her going to her sister or both girls sleeping with their mother on some nights, but it was more intimate than that with Eli. His scent comforted her in a different way. “When our dad died my sister and I just grew closer. I don’t know if its because we were girls or if maybe we were younger than you two were. It’s hard to explain or understand why those things happen.” She offered to him, giving him that little bit of insight into her past, though it wasn’t much in comparison. As much as she tried, it was still hard for her to talk about Aurelie or her mother. She’d had more time with them and had watched both of them die. How easy could it be to talk about someone when those circumstances were in place?



She took in a breath of the cool air and tried to think of what she could say to him that wouldn’t hurt so much. The only thing that had numbed over time was the memories concerning her father, but she didn’t know how to bring him up. Instead she shelved it and tried to think of something more pleasant to ask him, nothing too close to the heart. The last thing she wanted to feel was her questions causing him any sort of pain. “Did you both go to the London Institute together, then? I’m sure it was reluctant, but do you remember anything about it? I’d never even been to an Institute until I came here. Are they all the same?” She asked of him as she recalled how she had avoided the Paris Institute after her sister died. She could have had a home and been well taken care of until she was of age, but after all that had happened she knew she couldn’t do it. People would ask questions, she would be brought before the Clave in trying to understand why her mother had been turned and why she would kill her own sister. It was best for that to remain with her to find out. Her sisters ashes would have never been sanctified if they had known how she had died. That she had been a Downworlder.



When she had handed the ashes over to be put in the City of Bones she hadn’t thought about how many rules she was breaking or that she may even be given death should they find out. All she had been thinking was that her sister had been pure and wanted to be nothing more or less than a Shadowhunter. She deserved to rest with her father regardless of what had happened to her. She was still Aurelie no matter what afflicted her.

[Serendipity]

Eli hadn't thought to ask whether they were getting a cab or taking the subway system back to the Institute, they had started walking and talking once they were free of the coffee shop and neither of them it seemed had really thought too much on how they were getting back. He'd seen the sign for the subway and had made the decision for the both of them, leading her towards that method of transport. She had said she would teach him how it all worked so that he could get around easily and had figured why not start tonight, if only it was a brief lesson.

He glanced down at the blonde as she mentioned the Hawaii Institute after he;d told her about it and how maybe one day they could go there together to see if the rumours were true. He felt suddenly warm all over, and his heart did a kind of flip-flop inside his chest; she was talking about a future that they might have or at least still be in each other's lives. He wasn't quite sure exactly what they were yet or what it all held for them, but hearing her talk as if he would still be in her future was enough.

"And a big floppy sunhat." He told her with a little smirk as they came to the steps to the subway below. "I could learn how to scuba dive and we could swim with the dolphins." He tact on, happy to go along with the idea even if it was a big stretch to hope it might one day happen. He stopped beside her when they came to the bottom of the stairs and the barriers blocking their way, his attention turning to the machine Audrina went to, letting go of his hand, saying something about him needing a card. Obviously they were going to do the subway things by the mundane book and not use glamours to bypass anythings, it would have been easier but then he wouldn't get the full experience she thought he should.

"You can't just buy a ticket as you go?" He questioned curiously beside her as she began pressing buttons on the machine. He wasn't sure how often he would use the subway in a week, but it didn't matter because apparently you could refill the card with another weeks worth if needed. He nodded as she explained he would need a card and that it would cost 30 dollars for the weeks travel but a dollar for the card. She was already puling money from her pocket and feeding it into the machine before he could reach for his wallet and he scowled at her a little but let it slide, arguing about who paid for what seemed a little childish at this point.

He smiled and shook his head a little as she told him he would be like any old Mundane now with his subway card, and when it run out he could keep it as a type of souvenir of his time here. "And if I need to refill the card for say...a six months to a years worth? You can show me how next time." It wasn't a question he needed an answer to straight away and he'd only said it because he wanted her to know he wasn't running off anywhere yet. It was as if he could sense that was what she'd been wondering about.

Their fingers brushed as Audrina handed him his card and again there was that familiar tingle, a little spark of electricity that was getting harder and harder for him to ignore. She showed him how to use the card to get through the turnstile and he copied her movements meeting her on the other side with a satisfied grin. All this wasn't so hard, but glamour would have been easier. She seemed to have read his thoughts with what she said next about doing it this way was more fun then using glamours. "If you say so, but I suppose I can get used to it." He agreed.

"Then I guess we just look for which train will get us closest to the Institute?" He guessed as his eyes roamed over the different terminals and numbers.

[Yunalesca]

After she had given him the card she had almost paused at his mentioning refilling it when it ran out. She had been finding her way around outright asking him if he was staying, but his response just now had he body freezing up for some reason. She couldnt say why it was happening, maybe her senses were too overloaded with the emotions she felt at maybe having him around for longer. He hadnt said outright that he was staying for sure, but had just thrown out there that he was considering it. She didn't know how much time she had left and couldn't say if she would even be around for another six months, but hearing him say what he just had was comforting. In the back of her mind she had been thinking of how one day he would be gone. One day he would admit there was nothing here for him and would return to London or even Alicante. The fear she felt over that confirmed she had grown attached, though she wouldn't admit to just how much or in what ways. Instead of saying anything clever she could only offer him a small smile. "I can do that." She offered before they were starting across the platform.

After stepping onto the platform she turned slightly back to Eli to watch his expression as he looked at one of the monitors and seemed to try and understand how it worked. A sly smile came to her lips before she took hold of his hand. "Its Ditmas and Kings so we'll need the M train. It stops near that intersection." She explained before he could try and figure it out himself. "Manhattan and Queens are easier to remember. Their streets are pretty much all numbers so you know what direction you're going and obviously how close you can get to your street. You kinda have to ride around to get a feel for it unless you want to study maps." She offered as she gently led him to the very end of the platform where the M would stop. Her fingers wrapped around his as they walked while she was finding herself more and more comfortable with this small gesture. Touch was something she had always been afraid of since having buried her sister. A part of her was even more terrified after what Maddox had done to her, but Eli had been there through all of it. He had been the one to carry her after it'd happened and heal her wounds. He felt familiar and she wasn't so afraid of the feel of him anymore. Anything beyond the more innocent touch, however, she didn't think she could handle at the moment. There were emotional scars forming from how the Were had pulled her belt away and ran his nose up her throat. She almost involuntarily shuddered at the flash of the memory when she stopped them by one of the support beams to wait.

The need to distract herself arose and so she looked to Eli, remembering what he had been saying earlier about the Hawaii Institute. "Swimming with dolphins and scuba diving. You do realize that is pretty Mundane as well. If this is too difficult for you how on earth are you getting into a wet suit and outfitting scuba gear?" She said with a slight smirk to give away that she was joking at his expense again. He was a little different from the others in this respect. She couldnt picture Alec or even Jace being caught trying on a wet suit, or even buying a sub pass like they just had. She had spent enough time living amongst Mundanes to not have their same train of thought. There was nothing, in her mind, to be turning her nose up at. Sure they weren't advanced like Shadowhunters and had no clue of what was going on around them, but sometimes their way of life was easier. Sometimes it was just easier to slip into their world for a moment to allow herself to breathe. Life of Downworlders, demons, and death had a way of choking her with both hands and she needed relief. The others didn't understand it, but the others barely knew her at all. And she was the only one to blame for that.

As she thought about this she felt the air pressure change and looked back to Eli with a pull of a smirk at the corner of her mouth. "The M is coming." She explained before the overhead could announce it and the sound of train cars moving over metal tracks found their ears. "Three stops and we'll be a block from the Institute." She yelled a little over the braking sounds of the train, having rose up on her toes to say it in his ear before dropping back down. After having done it she felt a little warm, like somehow that had been intimate when she'd done nothing but say something in his ear. Relax she was calling in her head again as the doors opened and she stepped on with Eli, taking the end seat by the door that was just big enough for two if you weren't afraid of being a little snug.

The ride was relatively short and quiet in comparison to the normal daytime hustle and bustle of the subway, devoid of performers and people consumed in their phones or newspapers. She had almost hoped for one of the performers to come on so Eli could see them, but she was reminded that maybe she had a little more time than she previously thought. Another day she could show him the music and dance that filled the stations and sub cars on a daily basis. "This is us." She said in his ear as the conductor called out the upcoming stop. She felt herself pause as she pulled away and looked him in the eye, a feeling coming over her as they were close enough to kiss. She took a breath before she felt the train jerk slightly to a halt, signalling their stop had come. She tore her gaze away and got up from the sear, stepping out onto the platform with ease as she tried to calm her racing thoughts. She had almost done it again when she had been telling herself to maintain control all night. She was going to complicate things if she didn't reel her emotions in, if she didn't get some of her walls back up before she made a monumental mistake.

[Serendipity]

It wasn't his first time riding the subway system, he'd had to use it a few times in London. It was his first time actually paying attention to how the system all worked however. He wasn't sure if would get the gist of it all straight away, at least not in this first lesson Audrina was giving him. The few times he had ridden the subway system around London he had been with other Shadowhunters on a hunt and they'd beeb under glamours, there had been no need to procure a card and pay for the travel. Audrina, he was beginning to see, liked to do things the Mundane way with a lot of things and it just highlighted how different they were. She had grown up basically as a Mundane although she was a Shadowhunter by blood, and he had grown up as a true Nephilim should. Eli didn't mind the lessons she would give him as to the Mundane way of things and how they worked though.

As her hand reached for his hand he almost missed what she said about Manhattan and Queens being the easier suburbs to navigate, the warmth of her hand and the soft curl of her fingers through his was very distracting. He still managed to absorb most of what she was saying and bobbed his head a few times so show he was understanding what she was saying. They stopped by one of the support beams while they waited for their sub car, and Eli leant his side up against it whilst still holding her hand in his other hand. Absentmindedly his thumb brushed along her hand, following the curve of her finger it was closest to while they waited.

As Audrina broached the subject of the Hawaii Institute again, Eli shrugged a little as he thought about what she was saying. "There are some Mundane activities that are too tempting not to try, and I'm not that stuck up of a Shadowhunter not to give some of them a shot. Not that I've tried scuba diving or swam with dolphins before." He explained with a little smile. "I'm sure the scuba gear will come with instructions. How hard could it be?" He mused, but of course he wouldn't know that for sure until he actually found out himself how hard it might be.

He felt the pressure in the air change and had a sense that a sub car was coming and he looked around to see if it was, catching Audrina's smirk as he did. She confirmed that the M train was coming before it was announced overhead and not even a few seconds later the sound of train cars moving over metal found his ears. He was watching the sub car pull up beside them and didn't notice Audrina lean forward and stand on her toes to speak in his ear until he felt her warm breath on his skin. He turned his head just in time to see her dropping back down to her feet and he could still feel the spot at his ear tingling where her breath had touched. Before he could say or do anything further the doors to the M opened and she was leading him through them.

The seat she chose by the end door was a little snug in Eli's opinion but he certainly wasn't complaining. Audrina sat by the window and he sat beside her, keeping his hand in hers and glad that she had yet to pull away. Her rested their hands on top of his knee as they sat side by side during the ride, their knees bumped occasionally reminding him just how close they were sitting and it was tempting to lean into her, maybe let go of her hand to put his arm around her shoulders instead. He was so lost in his thoughts, going through the outcomes in his head it he did put his arm around her, that he hadn't realised they were coming to their stop. Audrina announced they were, again in his ear, jerking him out of his reverie.

When he turned his gaze to her this time, she hadn't moved away and his breath caught in the back of his throat as their lips every nearly brushed together. Their eyes locked on each other for much longer then was necessary, and he wondered if she was thinking the same thing he was in that moment; he could lean forwards under half a second and kiss her, would she want that? He didn't get the chance to find out, which was probably a good thing, because the sub car jerked to a complete stop and Audrina was getting quickly to her feet which in-turn had him standing and moving out into the walk way so she could get past him.

Nothing was said as they both stepped onto the platform and he realised they were no longer holding hands. He sighed softly to himself, but didn't try to take her hand again as they started to make their way out of the subway terminal. "So did you want to find somewhere quiet to talk some more; you've probably still got a million questions you want to ask me," Eli smirked, "Or did you just want to head to bed?" He questioned lightly as they walked the rest of the block back to the Institute.

[Yunalesca]

She had barely managed to come to her senses when the train stopped and they were staring at each other. He could have breached that little bit of space if she had given a signal, but somehow she hadn't. Whether it was because her memory of Maddox or her conscience breaking through to remind her what would happen if she let it she didn't know. Once they were off the train and exiting in the turnstiles her hand didn't reach for him again. It felt cold not having contact with him, but she had reminded herself that maybe she had dropped her walls too much. She had told him she would be a little more open with him, but what expense was she willing to pay? If she wanted she could let him have her, but she would lose her mother in the process. It was him or her last living relative, if you could call the undead 'living'. The choice had never been as hard as it was for her now. But she knew what the right choice was and that was to save her mother's soul. This was what she thought about when they made their way up the steps to the cool night air.

To keep the temptation at bay she wrapped her arms round herself as though she were cold when really it was easier to keep her hands to herself this way. Not only that, Eli couldnt take hold of what wasn't there to begin with. They walked the length if the block before the delapidated church came into view, then her true Shadowhunter vision brought it to life to what it really was. She couldnt help but look up at the towering spires as Eli was speaking beside her. She drew her attention away and gave him a questioning look until she realized what he had said. "Oh. I'm really not that tired if you're not. I can fix up a little snack if you can handle the tea, then we can go up to the greenhouse or something." She offered, feeling the danger in it already. She had spent a lot of alone time with him today. She had almost kissed him on the train, and now she was going up to the greenhouse with him and a cup of tea. This could end very badly, though she was struggling to see how that particular end could be so bad. You're toying with him a voice echoed and she quickly shut it down. He knew she couldnt be affectionate. He couldn't possibly expect anything from her. Or this was what she told herself.

When they entered the Institute and the doors had locked behind them, she stripped off her coat and hung it on the rack by the door, close to the copious amounts of Isabelle's jackets. She paused the petite leather one at the end. "Clary's here." She did aloud, wondering now if maybe the greenhouse was occupied. Though given their attitude as of late, she highly doubted Jace and Clary would be conversing up there in the most intimate setting of the Institute. She steered clear of that mess, but she was aware of it as well. It made it easier to stay out of their way and not get involved. She shrugged absently to Eli as she brushed her lace sleeves back down over her hand. "I picked up some Irish cheese and specialty sausage last time I was out. I don't know how it will taste with tea, but we can try it out." She offered to him before leading them toward the kitchen. She was trying to think of what to take with him about already, trying to avoid sensitive topics so she wouldn't upset him as they spoke. That was difficult when you were most curious about someone's family who happened to be mostly deceased.

"Did you travel much as a kid? Like little family vacations or anything?" She asked him suddenly when she pushed through the kitchen door, the question really coming out of nowhere and almost surprising even her. It was still a question to her on how similar Shadowhunter and Mundane families could be.

[Serendipity]

He hated this feeling; the uncertainty of whether or not he take her hand again as they walked the block back to the Institute. The temptation there of course, it always was but the uncertainty of it all was greater. Her body language had changed the moment they’d walked out of the subway station, surfacing as they drew closer to the old church that was the Institute. It was subtle but it was there all the same, telling him to keep his distance this time. He sighed quietly to himself as he simply walked beside her, eyes trained on the footpath and hands tucked into his pockets.

He only broke the silence as they Insitute had come into view, he had to know if this was it and they’d go their separate ways to their rooms now that they were back or if she wanted to spend more time with him. His gaze came up from the footpath to look across at the blonde Shadowhunter as she answered his question and he had to reign the smile he felt tugging at his lips so she wouldn’t know just how relieved he was that she’d decided to stay with him a little longer. “Tea sounds good, any more coffee and I definitely won’t sleep.The greenhouse might be nice,” He nodded then added with a hint of a smirk, “As long as you promise not to throw another dagger at me.”

It may have not been so wise to remind her of the last time they’d been up in the greenhouse together, they’d argued (like usual back then) and it had certainly been one of their more heated arguments; she’d thrown a dagger at him, it had missed but there had been a split second when he’d wondered if she had truly meant for it to hit him. There was nothing he had done or said during their time together tonight that would give her reason to throw anything at him though, so he was pretty sure he was safe in that respect.

As she unlocked the doors to the Institute and let them both in he untucked his hands from his pockets, pulled several items out of his jacket (witchlight and wallet) relocating them to his jean pockets instead before shucking it off to hang it beside her coat and several others on the rack. He hadn’t been here long enough or paid enough attention to the coat rack near the doors to recognise who they all belonged too so he would never have guessed that Clary was here if it wasn’t for Audrina announcing as much. He recalled the deal he’d made with the girl in return for his help with Simon, and wondered if maybe now she was talking with Jace as he had asked of her. Eli didn’t want to bring that up however, bringing it up would only remind Audrina that he had gone behind all of their backs to help Simon who had been bitten and had turned into a vampire.

“If I can eat beer and eggs together, then I’m sure tea, sausage and cheese will be alright.” Eli pointed out at her uncertainty of whether or not tea would go with the cheese and specialty sausage she was thinking of preparing for them both. He followed her to the kitchen, rolling up his sleeves of his long shirt now his jacket was off and it was a little warmer inside the Institute. Her question brought his attention back to the fact that he had told her she could ask him any questions she could think of, a process he’d hope would mean they’d get to know each other better even if it might be a little one sided to begin with.

“Not often; there was so much of Alicante that our father wanted us to see first. If we ever went on vacation it was to see my grandparents in Ireland.” He explained, “They weren’t Irish but they called Ireland home, something about the place appealed to them.” He smiled a little at the memory, although he could scarcely remember their last vacation as a family it had been so long ago. “It was such a long time ago though, I barely remember them.” He said a little sadly. He was sure there were pictures of them along with the rest of his family back at his home in Alicante, if he saw them again the memories would probably resurface easier.

“I’ll get the tea started.” He announced as they entered the kitchen, he wasn’t about to let her do it all while he sat back and watched.

[Yunalesca]

She had to pause and almost smirk at his comments of the last time they had been to the greenhouse, a little bit of color coming to her cheeks as they made towards the kitchen. “No daggers on my honor. Besides, I’d have hit you if I really wanted to.” She explained as she remembered the rage she had felt at how he had spoke to her that day. He had struck a nerve in telling her she’d be alone since she already was. She had never let herself notice or care until he smacked her in the face with it. It wasn’t something she had ever been afraid of until that moment. Even then the emotion had been fleeting as she remembered she wouldn’t even live to the age where she would die peacefully in her sleep. It was rare for a Shadowhunter to do so and given her mission to herself she knew she wouldn’t live. Still she brushed this aside when he spoke anew to answer her question.



She couldn’t say she had ever been to Ireland, or that she was even well traveled. The most she had ever done had been in the last ten years following leads on her mother’s whereabouts and even that had only been a handful of places before Brooklyn. “I’d imagine the relaxed atmosphere would be appealing. I’ve never been there, but heard the stories. I’d guess an ease would be nice after a life of hunting demons and who knew what else.” She offered, making the assumption that his grandparents had also been Shadowhunters. It was in all their blood to have the lineage passed and it was a rarity to have Mundane relatives in the line. It wasn’t unheard of, but she doubted even those marriages hadn’t been documented. You had to choose one world or the other with little exception.



She offered him a soft smile of thanks as he offered to handle the tea while she got the rest prepared. “Just like a man, take the easy route.” She joked with another grin before opening the fridge and removing the sausage and wedge of Irish cheese. Both were set on a cutting board and she grabbed a knife from the drawer to slice them down into edible pieces. “I have no memories of my grandparents. I don’t even think they existed when I was born. We didn’t have a single picture…sometimes it made me wonder if that was part of the reason my parents left.” She said after opening the sausage package and beginning to cut it into medium cut sizes to pair with the cheese. She hadn’t expected to share such personal information with him, but somehow it had come out as some sort of condolence to him not remembering much. She still felt there was some sort of conspiracy theory around her parents exit of Alicante and she had always wondered if their parents death had been the trigger. “I guess you should be happy to have something to hold onto. I couldn’t even tell you my grandparents names.” She said, though she remembered having thumbed past them in her search for what happened to her father. She guess a part of her didn’t care to know, to make a bond after having never known them or had them mentioned in her lifetime.



“Sorry, that was a little insensitive.” She said while slicing open the cheese package and realizing how that had come out. She had said what she said to try and make him feel better and instead it likely instilled a guilt. Her lack of social skills were continually coming through even when she was trying to make people feel better. She shook her head at herself and cut the cheese down into shapes before she was moving the ingredients onto a small glass platter and rifling through the cupboards for some kind of cracker to stack them on. She found club crackers near the back and was thankful they hadn’t been opened yet. Stale crackers were the worst. “Maybe Ireland could be another place for you to visit, refresh old memories and all.” She offered as she tried to think of something more to say, though it had become difficult again as she struggled with how she had said her previous comment to him. There were times where she felt like she sucked the happiness and life out of things and this was one of those times. The slight giddiness she had felt earlier while they were out watching a film and getting coffee had tapered off even as the caffeine was firing neurons in her brain to make her energetic and happy. Old habits died hard it would seem.

[Serendipity]

He believed Audrina when she said that she would have hit him with her dagger if she’d really wanted to, he’d seen her aim before and it was good, he bet she rarely missed her target. If they ever argued like that again, which he hoped they wouldn’t, he hoped there wouldn’t be any sharp objects around. Recalling the argument, he had said some pretty hurtful things to her; really he’d deserved something thrown at him, although perhaps not something as deadly as a dagger. “Yes, I believe you would have.” He chuckled a little.

She had assumed right about his grandparents, his father's parents had both been Shadowhunters as had his mothers, only he’d never met his mother’s parents they had died when she was in her early twenties before he was born. The life of a Shadowhunter could be morbid, it was common knowledge about the rarity of a Shadowhunter living a ripe old age. “Yeah, either that or they enjoyed the rain and constant damp.” He shrugged.

“The easy route?” Eli questioned, exaggerating the words just a little as he turned and quirked a brow in her direction. “Your tea is difficult, it’s not just dunking a bag in hot water. You like the authentic stuff.” He pointed out with a smug little smirk because he at least knew how she liked her tea. “Peppermint or chamomile?” He then asked as he filled the kettle with fresh water and heated on the stove whilst Audrina went to the fridge for the food.

He was reaching for cups whilst he waited for her reply when she reflected a little on her own grandparents after he’d mentioned he couldn’t remember much about his own. He found out then that she didn’t have any memories of hers and that their non-existence may have had something to do with her parents leaving Alicante. “I’m sorry you didn’t know your Grandparents.” He replied sympathetically before she added her next comment and he arched a brow. Her comment was a little thoughtless and her tone somewhat harsh and from her reaction he kind of wished he hadn’t mentioned his grandparents even though he’d had no idea that she’d never known hers. “A little,” He nodded because he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t, but he didn’t think any less of her for it, they’d all said insensitive things.

“I’m not sure if I want to refresh old memories,” He said after a while after he mention of him going back to Ireland one day, his words were barely audible, once he’d realised what other questions it would bring up he’d immediately lowered his voice. He shook his head and essentially he was shaking off the comment itself as he prepared their tea.

[Yunalesca]

He had a way of making her feel guilty and he was doing it now as a barely audible ' I’m not sure if I want to refresh old memories' came from him. She stopped arranging the pieces into neat piles on the plate then, both hands resting on either side of the plate as she bit her lip and wished she could take back what she'd said. Not once had she ever said something without meaning it, but she knew she had sounded bitter in what she said and took it out on him. What came out of her a moment earlier had nothing to do with him and she hadn't meant to aim it at him. "See what I mean about my social skills? They suck eggs, which is why I don't talk very much. I say stupid things like that." She said as a sort of angry apology, angry at herself for speaking to him like that when he was trying to talk simply with her, when he had gone out on the town with her on a whim. She shook her head and let a less than mirthful laugh escape her. "Maybe I should be switching to alcohol. I might be more fun while intoxicated." She said with a shake of her head before she went back to arranging the items on the plate, busying herself to get her mind away from what had just passed between them.

The easiness that had been there earlier was escaping her grasp more progressively with each passing moment. A part of her was wondering now if this was a good idea at all. She had just given a part of herself to him and it hadn't been anything good. What had been a nice conversation had quickly turned dark thanks to herself. She could see her 'bubbling personality' was coming out and making this more difficult than it should be. She was reminding herself of how she had been when they had first met. Everything was dark, everything was stripped of joy. That was what she did to things she touched and it would be best for him if she stepped away now before he got too hurt. But as she thought this that hopeful part of her grabbed hold and tried to shake her. He was good for her and she shouldn't run away from him. At the thought she paused again. It was the first time she had ever thought that and it was an odd feeling that it instilled. She swallowed and looked over at Eli as he worked on their tea, working silently as she wondered what he was thinking. "Let's move on from that." She said quietly as though it would make everything better. She wouldn't blame him for not wanting to talk to her at all now, but she was going to put in an effort to open the floor to questions again. Though this time she would be more careful. You're playing with a dangerous fire a voice warned as she averted her gaze.

"Since we've established I'm pretty horrible at this I think its your turn to ask me something. I'm the almighty enigma so you've gotta be curious about something." She offered to him, though her heart was pounding the whole time she was saying it. He could open a lot of wounds with the simplest of questions, but she had said she would try being more open with him. At what expense that would be she didn't know yet. She was terrified of him asking something about her family or even details of her growing up. She didn't share those with anyone and was afraid she may let what happened to her mother slip. Or even worse, her sister. She had never forgiven herself for what she had done to Aurelie to save her own life and even thinking about it now made it hard for her to breathe. She closed her eyes and willed her sisters face from her mind. She had cried enough in front of him, had done it far too much in her opinion, and couldn't let it happen now simply because she thought of her sister. He won't ask it she thought as she opened her eyes again and finished with the platter of snacks. "Foods ready whenever you are." She tried with a small laugh, though it barely held mirth as she was still struggling with her thoughts and with what she had said to him earlier. She couldn't remember the last time she had ever felt this much emotion.

[Serendipity]

If Eli had known his remark about not wanting to refresh old memories would have made Audrina feel guilty in anyway he never would have said it. He had said she could ask him anything, and essentially that they could talk about anything, he just hadn't realised how hard it might be. At the same time it was good to talk, he hadn't spoken of his family in anyway shape or form to anyone for a very long time and getting some of those things off of his chest, remembering the good times didn't feel as difficult as he'd first thought it would, although it was still a little hard. That was what it was all about he supposed if he wanted Audrina to get to know him, speaking of his family was part of that although it was a gloomy subject considering they were no longer around. It also trudged up old memories of her own and he could understand that it might upset her, make her a little gloomy as well.

"You're just a little out of practice that's all. Look at me for instance; half the time I come out and say whatever's on my mind, sometimes its rude and uncalled for and I have to work on that." Eli explained in hopes of reassuring her that what she had said wasn't all that bad and didn't change his opinion on her. He had stopped preparing their tea for a moment to rest a hip against the counter in her direction as she'd spoken of her lack of social skills and her next comment about switching to alcohol so she'd be more fun had his lips turn up in a slight smirk as he tried to imagine her drunk. For some reason he couldn't quite picture it or her letting go completely of all the defences she had built up and letting her 'hair down' so to speak. "Or you could just end up spewing everywhere; that's never any fun." He joked lightly, his gaze catching hers as she turned then to look at him. He offered her a smile and nodded as she suggested they move on from their previous topic.

When she informed him that it might be his turn to ask some questions, saying that she could guess that he might be curious about her, he was a little taken aback. He wasn't quite sure if she meant he could ask her 'anything' as he had said she could do for him, or if she meant he could ask her 'anything that didn't involve her past' which was a little hard since most of the questions he did want to ask her involved her past and her parents. Eli swallowed as he tried to think of what things would be appropriate to ask her without bringing up hurtful events in her past. "You are a puzzle," He agreed, stalling a little for time. She was still a mystery to him and perhaps he was for her too; he'd never liked puzzles, he'd never had the patience for them. But she was a puzzle that he wanted to solve if he could. "Let's resume the questions once we're up in the greenhouse," He suggested and since she had announced that the food was ready and all he had to do was add water to their teas it wouldn't take them long to get to the greenhouse, and hopefully by then he'd had thought of something to ask her.

Eli turned back to their teas, grabbing the kettle off of the stove as he did and poured the water evenly into each cup. He had opted for chamomile tea instead of peppermint as he wasn't so sure the minty flavour would go so well with cheese and sausage. He found a tray large enough for their cups and the plate Audrina had prepared and sat the items on it, also going to the fridge for two bottles of water in case the tea didn't work at all with their food. "Let's head up to the greenhouse." He announced as he picked up the tray and then followed her out of the kitchen headed for the almost hidden stair case that would lead them up to their destination.